Abouya

I can't remember what I used to do
Who I trusted, whom I listened to before
I swear you've taught me everything I know
Can't imagine needing someone so
But through the years it seems to me
I need you more and more….

~ Kenny Rogers, from the song Through The Years

I sit here tired with sore legs from putting up and then taking down party decorations. Yesterday was my father's 70^th Birthday. Born in 1940 one of 10 children, the kindest man I know. My father…

This morning as I downloaded all the photos off the camera so I can make a DVD Slideshow of it to give my dad I sat and thought about the 20-odd years that I have had the pleasure of having this man in my life. With Luther Vandross' Dance with my Father playing (part of the slideshow music) I felt sad. I swear, that must be the saddest song in the world! So sad I felt, I had a huge lump in my throat, tears were welling up in my eyes and I wished so bad that I could make sure that he outlives me! I felt heartbroken with the thought of his inevitable departure but then I got distracted by Farah who found a tub of Aqueous Cream and decided to eat it and I told myself STOP BEING SO NEGATIVE and GLOOMY and just go clean up your child before she makes the entire place greasy.

So anyway, my Father's Birthday was wonderful! He thanked me (and my sis) about a hundred times, each time I quickly turned away because I didn't want to cry but deep inside I really wanted to say "PLEASE PLEASE, don't thank me". Thinking of all the worries and gray hairs I have given him there's nothing I could ever do to repay him. The party, the surprise visit to the optician for new glasses, the cakes and everything is nowhere close to paying my dues.

I'm an indebted and forever grateful daughter; as I grow older I wish I become the person my dad always was….


Ilhaam bint Isgaak
(ilhaam daughter of Isgaak)