Procreation

I’m just gonna say it. I HATE BEING PREGNANT!

Pregnancy for many is supposed to be a special time. Many women struggle, long for and fight to achieve the state of pregnancy. Others are never blessed with successful pregnancies and/or childbirth and then there’s me, I have no issues falling pregnant. Even being on contraception for years, one missed pill and I’m pregnant. Unfortunately what comes along with the ease of falling pregnant is the most horrible experience in the world….MORNING SICKNESS that lasts forever!

From the 3^rd or 4^th week of pregnancy and for the whole of the rest of the first trimester I am violently ill E V E R Y S I N G L E D A Y ! Morning, noon and night sickness for months! It really gets you down. You wake up feeling sick, you spend the entire day feeling sick, and you go to bed feeling sick. The awful feeling never goes away. For the first time in my life I really understood what it must feel like to have a terminal illness. Not saying that Morning Sickness is anything like having cancer, TB or whatever other irrepressible disease, I just understood what it feels like to suffer. You suffer alone. Everyone around you are continuing their lives as normal. Enjoying food, going to work, watching TV, making plans and carrying on with day to day things. I was living my days, one hour at a time. Being thankful that an hour has passed and I didn’t vomit the food I ate…just yet. You don’t feel like going out, going to work is the hardest thing to do, you turn down all invitations, don’t answer the doorbell or the phone, you really are just sitting, waiting and praying to feel better. Nothing helps, no matter how many crackers I eat, how much ginger I consume or all the other remedies I've tried, nothing makes it go away so yes it did feel a bit like an incurable disease.

I’m around 16 weeks pregnant, in the second trimester and I'm still hanging in there. No, it’s still not gone. I still vomit whatever is in my stomach every morning. It draws all the energy from my body to vomit up stomach bile in the morning. I get to work at 7.15am and I am already tired.

It’s been the hardest few months of my life. Since around the middle of April I’ve been feeling unwell, not myself and a little grumpy. I’ve been trying to deal with what I’m going through in my head and in my heart and trying not to make my issue anyone else’s but it’s not easy being me. I have responsibilities. How can one manage morning sickness, working full-time, studying for exams (I failed 3 out of 4 exams this semester because of Morning Sickness), having a 4 year old child, a home and a husband all while trying to sort of live a normal life.

I’m starting to feel a lot better than a month ago but even having gone through all of this, I have no advice, no solution for others experiencing the same. All I can say is take it one day at a time and if that’s too long, take it one hour at a time. Unlike people suffering from terminal illnesses, atleast for us there’s an end in sight.

By far the most common craving of
pregnant women is not to be pregnant. 
~Phyllis Diller